played by
orange
POSTS
21
awards
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Inactive
call me henry, dipshit
male
24 YEARS OLD
May
29
gemini
washington, d.c.
heterosexual
beat cop
TAG WITH @henry
HENRY WALLACE
packing my bags and giving the academy a raincheck.
AN INTRODUCTION
i figured i better well explain what the hell i'm doing here, to begin with. the henrycanon began as a series of terrible headcanons based around my newfound child, mr. henry wallace. these headcanons, now dubbed the henrycanon, have been formed over the course of the past few days through the cbox and through the incredibly terrible, dirty mind of me, everyone's favourite fruit. i am most definitely not procrastinating through the writing of this, nope.
anyways, this thread will work as follows. any new set of henrycanons will be added as a new post; additions to an existing set will be marked with a timestamp of when it was added so the progression of his character may be seen.
useful terms:
henrycanon - the entire canon in this thread, based around henry.
henrycanon, a - a single henrycanon. rather confusing.
henrycanons - the plural of henrycanon, but not the entire canon
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played by
orange
POSTS
21
awards
|
Inactive
call me henry, dipshit
male
24 YEARS OLD
May
29
gemini
washington, d.c.
heterosexual
beat cop
TAG WITH @henry
HENRY WALLACE
packing my bags and giving the academy a raincheck.
HENRY'S HAIR
henry and his hair have a very dynamic relationship.
henry is very, very proud of his hair. his hair is the bestest, most amazing hair in the world, as he's been told. some say it defies gravity. why, of course it does! every morning, after he takes a shower, henry smooths his hair into the position it dries in and lasts for all day. he spends quite a bit of time sculpting it.
your hair will never be better than his. ever. don't try to tell him otherwise, or announce it, because it won't be.
henry does make his impressions of people based off of their hair. if your hair has no character or isn't voluminous enough, he will dislike you right off the bat.
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|
played by
orange
POSTS
21
awards
|
Inactive
call me henry, dipshit
male
24 YEARS OLD
May
29
gemini
washington, d.c.
heterosexual
beat cop
TAG WITH @henry
HENRY WALLACE
packing my bags and giving the academy a raincheck.
HENRY'S PLAYSTATIONS
because henry's parents pay his rent, he has a lot of disposable income which is spent on video games. to this end, henry owns eight playstations, scattered around the various locations he frequents. they are as follows:
big daddy - big daddy is the name of henry's playstation 4 that is kept at his apartment. he is the head honcho, the big guy. henry plays on him a lot and does not hesitate to play any sort of game on him.
pr0nstar - since henry is a horny guy, he has a special playstation 3 he keeps at his house just for eroges, many imported. no one knows about pr0nstar, since he is kept hidden in henry's closet and pulled out when... yeah.
druglord - druglord is the playstation 3 that henry keeps at the police station in the break room. this one gets a lot of use, considering henry does absolutely no work whatsoever while at work. unfortunately, henry can't play the too violent games or any shooters, really, on druglord, because he lives at the station. instead, it serves to play a lot of skyrim.
mr. president - since henry's mother is a senator, the playstation 3 that lives at his parent's house is named mr. president. games played on this guy are of the more docile variety, considering that his parents pay for his rent and henry does not want to tick them off. he has a lot of rhythm games for this baby.
bro 1 - bro 1 is the playstation 4 that lives at henry's friend's place. bro 1 plays a lot of call of duty.
bro 2 - bro 2 is the playstation 4 that lives at his other friend's place. bro 2 plays a ton of assassin's creed. a ton.
shampoo - so shampoo is the playstation 3 in henry's closet that sits alongside pr0nstar, awaiting the day that henry gets a girlfriend. once that day comes, shampoo will move to their place.
conditioner - conditioner is the playstation 4 that stays at booty call's place. conditioner gets either a lot of use or like none at all.
so why does henry have so many playstations? why not xboxes, you ask? henry had a very bad experience with xbox as a child. he got one and within a couple months it broke. like any good kid, he called microsoft for support, but he could never get through to the help center, so he switched to playstation. he's been very happy with sony's customer service.
(thanks to northy for help with shampoo and conditioner!)
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|
played by
orange
POSTS
21
awards
|
Inactive
call me henry, dipshit
male
24 YEARS OLD
May
29
gemini
washington, d.c.
heterosexual
beat cop
TAG WITH @henry
HENRY WALLACE
packing my bags and giving the academy a raincheck.
HENRY'S DAILY ROUTINE
for the curious person, here is henry's daily routine (on a VERY, VERY GOOD DAY WHERE NOTHING GOES WRONG).
6:30am henry wakes up from alarm clock.
6:35am henry hops into the shower.
6:40am henry gets out and proceeds to doing his hair.
7:00am henry is done with his hair and eats breakfast.
7:10am henry brushes his teeth. they're also perfect.
7:15am henry picks out any games he'll want for the day.
7:25am henry gets dressed into his perfectly pressed uniform.
7:30am henry departs for work, taking a lovely long stroll there.
7:45am henry gets into the line at starbucks and gets coffee.
8:00am henry arrives at work.
8:05am henry arrives in the break room and sets up for the day.
8:10am henry begins to play his chosen games, mostly skyrim.
11:45am henry goes to his cubicle because everyone's back for food.
12:05pm henry plays games on his computer until people finish.
1:00pm henry goes back to the break room and plays some more.
4:45pm henry gets ready to go home.
5:00pm henry leaves work, right on the mark.
5:20pm henry arrives home and does some shit.
11:00pm henry goes to bed if he wants to be well-rested.
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|
played by
orange
POSTS
21
awards
|
Inactive
call me henry, dipshit
male
24 YEARS OLD
May
29
gemini
washington, d.c.
heterosexual
beat cop
TAG WITH @henry
HENRY WALLACE
packing my bags and giving the academy a raincheck.
HENRY AND FOOD
henry is very, very picky. as such, he usually eats cereal for breakfast, bread or caesar (only caesar) salad for lunch, and then dinner based upon where he's eating. because he's so picky, he carries around all the condiments he will need in his pockets. of course, the only condiments he carries around are salt, butter, and minced garlic. he has special cooling pouches for the butter and the garlic, and he has one of those machines that will seal packets for you, so henry puts his salt in packets based on serving size. it's a real shock to strangers when he pulls out a whole stick of butter, but those who know him get used to it.
henry also is a pepsi drinker. he hates coke with a burning passion.
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